Recently someone asked me if I had been experiencing more antisemitism. To their surprise, I told that that actually I haven’t. The discussion then moved onto social media, and I realised that I was discounting the cesspit of hatred that I see on there.  It is almost like I have become inured to it.

In truth, though I post regularly on social media, including my new Video Torah E-Thought, I rarely read what is on there. While I appreciate those in communal positions and activist groups who battle the darkness, I feel my skills are better used to trying to shine more light.

Of course Judaism believes that everything in this world is about choice – are we choosing to use something for positive purposes or the opposite. But it struck me as sad that the very forums that were designed to bring people closer together are being used to spread hate.

Slanderous talk is not a new phenomenon. In this week’s parshah, the Torah instructs; “You shall not go about as a talebearer amongst your people; you shall not stand by your fellow’s blood.” The commentaries comment on the juxtaposition of the two commands and say that “one who bears tales is a murderer, as it is written: “You shall not go about as a talebearer amongst your people; you shall not stand by your fellow’s blood.” The Talmud goes a step further and says, “Evil talk kills three people: the speaker, the listener and the one who is spoken of.”

This seems troubling. The speaker of the slander obviously commits a grave sin by speaking negatively of his fellow and the listener too is a partner to this evil by consenting to listen. But why is the one who is spoken of affected by their deed? Are his negative traits worsened by the fact that they are spoken of?

Chassidic philosophy explains that every person possesses negative traits or tendencies, but their quintessential goodness, intrinsic to every soul, strives to control them, conquer them, and redirect them as a positive force. But when this evil is spoken of, it is made that much more manifest and real. By speaking negatively of the person’s trait or deed, the evil speakers are, in effect, defining it as such; with their words, they grant substance and validity to its negative potential.

This ancient Jewish principle is recognised by parenting and educational experts who advise against calling children negatives names at this may perpetuate the tendencies.

On the other hand, the same applies in the reverse: speaking favourably of another, accentuating his or her positive side, will aid them to realise themselves in the manner that we have defined them.